When your mindset is different to that of your partner

My wife has no interest in finance/investing which works for me when managing it

I do have to be ready to compromise (i.e. sacrifice savings/funds for investing) when she wants to travel (but I enjoy that too ).

Well I stuffed up there if that's what you're supposed to do (align all 'stances')... sometimes the differences are what keeps life interesting in my experience.

 

This is how it is for my wife and I also,
It's my 'thing' so to say, but we always agree on the decisions made, we are a team and we either win or fail together. As many have posted above, we also benefit from the fact that I am more risk ready and my wife more risk adverse. So in order for an idea to receive unanimous approval, it has to be really good. It helps that my wife is pro-property though. Shares and other forms of investment - not so much. But hey, plenty of fun to be had in property!

Edit: However, when it comes down to it, I run the finances, propose future plans, and manage the wealth creation. But every medium to big decision requires both party approval

 

This is true too, so there needs to be an agreement for one person to take the lead.

 

We've always done well with our PPOR's and they're tax free as well , So personally I'd probably never sell a PPOR unless I had another to move into or had no choice , ie banks are about to move in and it's the only one we can sell because the markets where our IP's are , are even worse ...

cliff

 

Thanks @See Change

 

In our house hold my wife is CEO and I've been given the role of minister for war and finance, so basically allowed to purchase as much property as i like provided we don't go backwards and make a loss.

 

I'm trying to imagine what your war chest might look like.

 

Like the Americans, all talk and no action. Never needed to go to war hopefully stays that way .

 

I'm reminded of a Kevin bloody Wilson song... Unfortunately the mods won't likey

 

I like this. My experience seems to be the same as many people here. My wife is a lawyer, and I hear lawyers are often very risk averse. Plus she has no interest in investing and hates debt. I am in the process of seeking my team (financial adviser, broker, better accountant), but haven't had much time the last few months to meet people - so early next year it will be guns blazing.

What I plan on doing is getting a plan together (rough one in my head at the moment), get the finance lined up, and present the bottom line. She doesn't need or want to know about the nuts and bolts, but so long as I keep the plan fairly conservative, it should(!) be fine.

Cheers,
Inertia.

 

So reading all the above, its probably good to have a partner of the opposite mindset... yin and yang...
One partner who is all in and another who is much more careful...
I think maybe it means that the exuberance of the carefree one is pulled back by the more cautious one and this stops exposure to most really bad investment ideas.
It seems to do ok in mine. Although I probably would be way wealthier if he was into investing, it does mean my current portfolio is super strong, and if I/we want to buy the super amazing PPOR, we both need to wholeheartedly agree its a sound idea and so we can do it. I guess it has stopped me chewing up all my borrowing capacity somewhat because if the deal is not great, I won't do it (I need to be picky on what I invest in... whatever I do I do need to think through very carefully and think how will it affect me in the future) which helps me maintain a buffer so to speak, and not be leveraged to the eyeballs so I have the option to do something different.

Care to go all in for a mining town?? Nope!

 

Sadly sometimes people change over the years. Glad it's working out for you though.

 

Well, we tend to come up with the worst scenario in almost every situation. Job hazard I suppose.

 

Not me.
I was more interested in marrying someone who is family oriented. How he interacted with his own family, the way he treated animals, how he was around children, high moral values, were all important considerations.

I'm also extremely family oriented and how he fitted in with my family was also important.

I can make money - I did not need someone to do that for me.
political stance and religion - couldn't care less, if he was a good person, he can believe in any god or have any political view point he wants. That would not affect anything in my life at all.

 

I agree, there are always ways to work with your partner to their comfort level. My partner is also conservative - great in ways as it has gotten me out of a lot of trouble, I tend to jump in fast.

It's great to have different view points bought to the table.

One thing I find with conservative people is that they tend to be more relaxed once they see things working, they don't have the initial enthusiasm to get things started because they are focused on the risk not the reward (my partner) but once they see it working, they become more enthusiastic and supportive.

 

What does the cat say?

 

don't you mean fox?

 

Your family sounds very similar to mine. My hubby is very conservative, won't believe things till he sees it. I call him a pessimist, he calls himself a realist. I still call him a pessimist

He's always been supportive in that he lets me do whatever I want, but hasn't actually been encouraging, if that makes sense. He likes stability, and loves regular his PAYG salary - and I completely understand that. But, I'm the opposite - I love working for commission and don't like the idea of my income being limited by anyone/anything. For eg, when I started my business he thought it would be nice if I could bring in a part time income, maybe $15-20k. For me, I was going to be happy when I earned more than him, and the sooner the better. Very different expectations.

But like you say, now that he can see things working it's much easier for him to see the value in my plans and for him to readjust his own expectations of what's possible.

 

This made me laugh so much because I can relate to it 100% LOL

Great that you are not letting the realism (pessimism) stop you and that you are working together to achieve what each wants despite the differences.

 

Haha he alright! My wife calls me pezzo! I'm a realist!! Haha but I'm the optimistic one with property,everything else she takes care of

We do both share roles. Im not very good with long term family plans or writing lists (!!), Mrs doesn't follow the numbers like I do so we compliment each other. She also thinks she's the funny one!