Pre-nups

I was thinking exactly same. My guess most here do not have pre nup in place.

 

I figured since we all see the value in our uncommon choice to have multiple properties...

 

I think most people that have been through breakdown of longish relationships would consider a BFA these days. I think it's important to have an agreed plan.

I've been through a divorce. Had no BFA for that relationship. It started in 2000. Attitudes to pre-nups/BFAas were I think different back then in Australia ( not that common ). Luckily it ended relatively amicably but it was still a painful time. A BFA would have made it easier.

Not exactly a romantic thing to do, but certainly important. Most mature people would see it that way. Not an easy subject to broach though.

 

I'd say the marrieds don't. The singles are all for them.
Although I find the notion rather ugly, it might be helpful for older singles. Take some of the fear out of the whole thing.
Then again, I insure as little as possible because there's something about not being insured that makes you just that little bit more careful - subconsciously.

 

Why not simply marry an 'equal' partner? I don't mean 'equal' in money terms only.

 

Yes, don't marry poor people unless you are both poor at the start.

 

Pre-nup scenario does not necessarily mean its bullet proof, could still end up in the courts and similar scenario to disputes over assets when divorcing and only winners will be the lawyers ??

MTR

 

We've built what we have together so a non issue for my personal relationship.

 

Definitely. We've built our life from scratch. Women in general don't end up well financially and I think just as with property investing, we need to mitigate risk.

 

Hmm, I know plenty of males who haven't done so well out of a separation, especially when there is children and property involved.

 

I don't know any women living it up post-divorce, either. Everybody loses when the same income has to support two households rather than one.

 

Agreed, not a good situation for either. Unfortunately it's even worse for the kiddies.

 

BFA's had some issues but that has mostly been cleaned up. The problem with them has been where the other party has gone to get independent advice and then it turns out they went to the cheapest lawyer they could find for the independent advice and the BFA wasn't explained properly to them.

For your SANF the lawyer doing your BFA should have separate documents prepared for the lawyer giving the independent advice and the other party also. If the other lawyer signs off that they have covered the points on this doc, explained thoroughly then it is not such an issue. Our insurer in QLD even provides a template for this letter.

And as someone else said, you can do a BFA before, during or after a relationship.

There has been a couple of cases where people who haven't lived together have been found to be in a relationship because regular gift giving constituted ongoing financial support. These were not small gifts. I actually think there needs to be a mistress/toyboy agreement in these sort of arrangements so that the unknowing (or tolerating spouse) doesn't lose a significant amount of what they would have otherwise have gotten.

 

Of course the elephant in the room is that divorce often occurs because of money issues. Imo the wrong one gets hold of the purse strings and the whole f a mily becomes disempowered. The one who's sensible has to be assertive enough to do the accounts. The one who's not needs to chill out and let it happen. If they're both hopeless, it could be easier.
(Typo corrected)

 

Just spent the last half hour reading through this thread.

Happy to disclose, I was married this year, bit of assets to worry about and no pre-nup, the missus is absolutely fine with it, however, it just complicates things. We can do a BFA but we are so busy at the moment (and happy) that we are not going through with it. Maybe we will maybe we won't, however I do feel it does poison the trust in a way.

Hope I am not one of the 50% that gets divorced but i'll take it as it comes.

Cheers, Ivan

 

Of course your misses is fine with it. Shes got nothing to lose!

Sorry to sound cynical

 

How do you know that? How do you know that she's not the one with more assets?

 

I dont. But lets ask him

Id bet my new shiny sneakers i bought on the weekend

 

It matters not whether the assumption is true or not in this particular instance; the assumption remains offensive.

 

Hi there-

Im in my late 30's so marriage is always complicated when you have worked your arse off for years and decide to take the next step. Unfortunately financial considerations do complicated things.

What I meant was that she was fine with a pre-nup, and is fine with a BFA. I did not do the pre-nup before the wedding. She is happy to do a BFA.

Her assets are international, she is Chinese and owns a few properties in China, however not sure if thats counted under Aussie Law in the event of dissolution of marraige.

We have since bought property here which is in both our names and will buy another....

Hope I don't update you with bad news!

Cheers Ivan