Developing negotiation skills

After recently reading 'Property Investors Guide To Negotiating' I'm thinking of putting time into developing negotiating skills . Perhaps buying one of the board games available ?

Anyone have any tips etc ?

 

I'm not an expert on negotiation, but I think it comes down to trying to find a WIN-WIN scenario for all parties, and this often involves trying to put yourself in the shoes of the other person, and finding out what their needs and motivation are. Usually most people are solely focused on 'Price', but you can also negotiate on 'Terms' e.g. early access to a property, longer settlement...

 

I personally believe its very important. Some people naturally are better negotiators and 'wheelers and deals' than others, but I believe a lot of it can be developed. And of course experience is your best friend. The other thing to understand is that the better you are able to build relationships in this industry, the better your negotiations will be heard with a positive outcome. If you really wanted to take it to another level and can be bothered, many master negotiators i have read about are also experts in NLP. Some negotiation books I have studied and made notes from:

Secrets of Power Negotiating - inside secrets from master negotiator, by Roger Dawson

Negotiating Secrets, by David Brown

A property investor's guide to negotiating, by John Potter

The negotiation book, By Stave Gates

Trump Style negotiation, by George Ross


I sometimes hear people talk about 'the market will pay what it will pay' and negotiating attempts will not do much. I can unequivocally say they are at best, extremely naïve. Often the 'WIN-WIN' scenario is mentioned by others. You will have to make up your own mind what exactly does win-win mean to you. Because think about it, if the sellers truly 'won', then you got a poor or at best average deal. However, sellers feeling happy in the transaction and satisfied IS important more often than not.

Me 2 cents.

 

My husband Angelo has written a book on negotiation. Come and pick up a free one from my office. Or I can post one out to you

 

One I've heard several times is "getting to yes". Mentioned to me again today.

 

It's fun to get in to the practice by haggling or asking people for discounts wherever you can - even small items bargained for at retailers, helps you build practical skills.

 

Is that offer open to me too?

 

Off course

 

+1 .. getting to yes is a good read

 

This book can be down loaded for free and I believe there is another titled 'Getting Past No' or something similar ..

 

Thanks for that . Those books look well worth while and I will sure check them out . There is quite a bit to view on you tube to look at , if you can be bothered sifting through it all .

What about board games or games where you can role play etc ? Any tips there ?

 

I've now read a number of books around negotiation and by far the best is ' Never split the difference ' by Chris Voss .

The author has a ton of experience in dealing with hostage situations while working for the FBI . Working under pressure in life and death scenarios . It's an easy to read book .

Also I attempted to take up the offer from Xenia but nothing was forthcoming!

 

I think people can learn a lot from playing card games and board games but you have to be willing to lose. However, honesty and trust, clarity with information are the most important "strategies" to negotiation I think. Okay, maybe there are certain things you hold back that are not critical to a negotiation but I will walk away from a sale if something critical is missing. Being willing to walk away from a negotiation is powerful too as it stops people from making hasty ill informed decisions.

 

+1 Great book and very interesting too.

 

I remember Mike Tyson saying once that everyone has a strategy until they're punched in the mouth. There are all types in this world and I now know some of the tools the pros use after this latest book I've just finished !

 

There is a game called the two dollar game that can be downloaded from one of the American universities for free . I've heard it's good .

The trouble with books , at least for me, is it's hard to really learn something well . Doing the real thing or simulating it is hard to beat .

 

Interesting topic- last year I did anonline course on negotiation thru Yale (in part to impress my daughters that I'm an Ivy league grad ).
Interesting stuff like the principle of the divided cloth and also a nifty way to split a cab fare among multiple parties going to different addresses. A key emphasis was to define the pie which was being split ie what ea party can achieve on their own versus what they can achieve together and splitting difference

 

I might go against the grain here and say that any courses or books on negotiation are only good for learning basic and theoretical skills.

I'd say once you have that basic grounding, the best way to actually improve your skills is direct experience and relevant knowledge.

ie. Going out there, making offers, and improving your knowledge about property.

 

I agree , not only with property though but all arbitrage that you do in life . I remember reading in one of Kiyosaki's earlier books where he mentioned that if you can not negotiate then you will most likely never get rich . I agree .

The Americans I believe are the best negotiatiors . Learn from the best !

 

You should see the Chinese. They are killers.