What's a bigger commitment. House or Marriage?

So a colleague and I just started debating what is a bigger commitment between getting married or buying a house with your partner?

I am strongly on the side of marriage being a bigger commitment than buying a house but I also think everyone is right in their own opinions so am not judging.

I just found it very interesting and thought I would open up the question to my wider PC family for discussion.

Thoughts people and reasons?

 

I agree with you that marriage is a bigger commitment because I am a firm believe in getting married once and it is "till death do you part" but it seems like these days people forget that there are 4 seasons in a relationship or the one heart, one person. With a house, yes you can fix it up and work on it like a marriage but you can also sell the house without any emotional attachment or baggage unless you sold it at a loss.

This is my personal view but you go into a relationship to give, not to take or how you can benefit from the union.

 

Marriage.

Houses come and go.

Cheers

Jamie

 

Don't know how you could even consider comparing the two.
A house is a few bits of material on some land.
Marriage is so much more than that.

 

What he said. if one contemplates this seriously, he or she is not ready for marriage. husband/wife is not a property.

 

Marriage for sure.
It probably cheaper selling a house and losing money on it than going through a divorce.

 

Relationships always win over possessions.

 

You can't compare 2 different things.
I'd say the closest comparison to getting married would be deciding whether or not to have kids.
These things are big commitments in ones life.

 

Yeah totally agree! His arguments on the topic are;
- Marriage is sometimes done for the other person. Meaning sometimes people get married more because the other person wants to. I do understand this and know of lots of people who got married because usually the female wants to. The male would be happy to never get married so meaning the actual act is not really a huge thing.

- It can be easier to get divorced than it can be too sell a house. Could be more financial loss if the breakup occurs during a market downturn.

My colleague is both married and has a house but ultimately I think what his argument boils down to is he doesn't hold the value I and I would imagine most people do on getting married.

 

I agreed that kids is number 1.
1 - Kids
2 - Married
3 - Buying a house


That is my order of life's biggest commitments

 

That would be the key..
Although I'm not married (engaged) I value our relationship a lot more than a house.. Any of our properties are very disposable and wouldn't care anywhere near as much about losing a few hundred grand on one property as losing a relationship with a child which may never get over?

 

Marriage would be number one,then the children then the family..

Because if you are lucky enough the find someone who you can spend your life with and wake you happy each day and become a good deontic listener ,rather then be unhappy in a straitjacket of fatal inconsistencies..

 

Houses come and go. Wealth may come and go. But if you treat your marriage like this it will be very expensive (not to mention lonely) for you.

 

Is this a trick question???

Has to be marriage of course.
House is a possession at the end of the day

 

I do think it's important to note that he is not saying a relationship and finding that right person who you can spend the rest of your life with is not one of if not the most important things in life.

He is purely talking the act of either marriage or buying a house. His argument being that commiting as a couple to the house is bigger than the act of wedding.

 

Haha I know! I'm having trouble debating because I can't fathom that it is a debate..

 

wedding is one day event, the commitment is hopefully a lot longer, however 50%+ divorce... that has to tell you something

 

Getting married is not difficult. keeping marriage is.

 

The wedding is not the marriage.

That's just a ceremony, the marriage is completely different.

 

Devil's advocate here

A mortgage to a house is 25 (or 30!!) years but a marriage can be much shorter. So to can the sentence for murdering someone.

So in terms of time there may be a point. Both are long commitments.

For me however it's marriage is more of a commitment as it comes with ethical/moral sides which I would like to fully commit to. I could sell a house much easier than I could 'sell off' my husband - not many buyers for him most likely anyway