My 17 yr old son - asked me what our financial position is

Discussion in 'Money Management & Banking' started by Arcticfire, 25th May, 2019.

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  1. Arcticfire

    Arcticfire Well-Known Member

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    Hi everyone

    I’m not sure if this is the right place to post this question - moderators - please feel free to move it to a better location

    My 17 yr old son asked me as to what our family financial position is

    He knows we own some property and shares but I have never discussed our exact position

    I was bit suprised by the question but I suppose he is doing business studies at school

    Just wondering if other people have discussed there exact financial position with there teenage kids . Not sure if they need to know the exact position

    But if anything it might be a great educational chat too

    Just wanted to see to what other people thought

    Cheers
     
  2. SatayKing

    SatayKing Well-Known Member

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    Can be a touchy subject depending on the personalities involved and I don't believe there is one answer.

    My late wife and myself certainly let our children know in a general way our aim was income derived from shares and why; passive, investing in the businesses of Australia. However, we did not say how much our income was as it really wasn't their business.

    Having said that we were open about having to put money aside aka the unspendable, to cover bills but in the "Hmm, rates are due shortly. Better put money aside to pay 'em. There goes the week at Thredbo, kids" sort of thing. Very general

    I do think it could work out differently family to family. Know of some parents who declined to purchase some item for a child get the retort "But you can afford it!"

    Better if both parents, assuming there is a both, are on the same page too because I think long-term it isn't a good outcome if it's just left to one to deal with the money. "Oh your father deals with that. I don't know a thing." Great. Common purpose but only one carrying the load.

    All the best. If you Google discussing money with your children, I'm pretty sure you will get plenty of hits and maybe some hints as well.
     
  3. Arcticfire

    Arcticfire Well-Known Member

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    Thanks for that satayking

    Yes I must admit the question took me by surprise

    I have never openly discussed our exact position with the kids

    But I think it might be a good idea to discuss the mechanics of what we are trying to do - in a generic sense - from a educational point of view

    On slightly different topic - with a name like Satayking - I assume you must like your food - satay is one of my all time favourite foods
     
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  4. Marg4000

    Marg4000 Well-Known Member

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    I would carefully seek out his true reason for asking.

    There is so much doom and gloom out there, and often frankly scary news on the TV and internet. The recent election hasn’t helped with the scaremongering.

    It may be that your son is anxious about his family’s financial security. Teens can obsess about many issues.

    Answer in terms you are comfortable with. It may be that “we work hard, we spend less than we earn, we invest our money wisely and have no financial worries” may be sufficient to allay any fears.

    If, of course, that is the situation. If you have financial worries, your son has probably picked up on it and it would pay to be reasonably honest.

    Then again, he probably has, or is in the process of getting, his driving licence. He may be planning to hit you up for a car of his own!!
    Marg
     
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  5. Barny

    Barny Well-Known Member

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    Be careful, your son could be a psychopath planning to take you out early for the inheritance. Just say'n...
     
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  6. Arcticfire

    Arcticfire Well-Known Member

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    Haha - I don’t think it’s anything sinister guys

    But thanks for the concern

    We are doing ok financially and that’s not something we can hide from him

    I think it’s just a question brought about by his business studies at school
     
    Last edited: 25th May, 2019
  7. SatayKing

    SatayKing Well-Known Member

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    LOL. If the lad does hit you up for buying a car reply with What part of No don't you understand?
     
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  8. SatayKing

    SatayKing Well-Known Member

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    Not prawns or other crustaceans. I'm allergic.
     
  9. Arcticfire

    Arcticfire Well-Known Member

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    Yes he is on his L’s and I’m sure he would like me to buy him a car - just like he wants me to buy him a Nintendo switch

    Haha - That’s a big fat no from me !
     
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  10. Arcticfire

    Arcticfire Well-Known Member

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    Still - the chicken and pork satay dude !!!!
     
  11. Scott No Mates

    Scott No Mates Well-Known Member

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    Having a couple of porches is a dead give away. :rolleyes:
     
  12. Arcticfire

    Arcticfire Well-Known Member

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    I wish !
     
  13. Cate Bell

    Cate Bell Well-Known Member

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    I don't tell my children our exact financial position. My children, around the same age as your son, know about the properties we own (what we paid, the valuations, rental returns, outgoings etc) and we have taught them about shares and super. I don't see why kids need to know your exact financial position, I ask my kids where they want to be in 5 years or 10 years time and how they will get there and tell them about some of the purchases that I have made and what I learnt from them.
     
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  14. Scott No Mates

    Scott No Mates Well-Known Member

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    I did say porches not Porsches :D
     
    Last edited: 25th May, 2019
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  15. inertia

    inertia Well-Known Member

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    my 8yo daughter was talking about how much money she has saved - nearly $500, mostly from birthdays and Christmas, and a bit of pocket money for doing jobs each week. She actually has the opposite problem to her siblings - cant decide what to spend money on, so doesnt spend any!

    I asked her if she wanted me to invest some, and we talked about compound interest... She got pretty excited!

    Cheers,
    Inertia.
     
  16. Depreciator

    Depreciator Moderator Staff Member

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    Good advice from Marg about how some kids worry about that stuff and the stability of the family finances - especially if they know kids whose families are struggling.
    Kids at school also often compare what their parents earn. I told my kids that because they go to a private school, they're never going to win any sort of discussion about family wealth. But I told them that we must be doing okay because I pay their school fees.
     
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  17. Rugrat

    Rugrat Well-Known Member

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    We are open with our kids about finances and budgeting in general. But no, we never share in specific detail what our actual financial situation is. And I have no plans of ever doing that inthe future either.

    If one of mine came asking me to detail what our family financial situation was, I would be sitting them down and discussing a couple of things.

    Firstly, how there is no 'family' financial position. Not unless they plan on getting a job and pooling their income to be used for household expenses. Their is 'mum and dad's' financial position. And that 'mum and dad' have investments and properties, and we also pay for for the kids food, housing, schooling etc. But that it is strictly 'mum and dads' and that they have zero input into what is done with it, and should has zero expectations of every getting any of it, either now or in form of inheritance.
    (In reality, I would love to be able to leave an inheritance behind, but I never want any of my kids having any expectations in that regard. I believe in people earning their own way in life, without expectation of parental financial assistance. Our kids are being raised with the expectation that there will be no inheritance, just as I was raised.)

    Secondly, that whilst we are happy to talk fortnightly budgeting and investment with them, it is simply none of their business what our 'exact financial position' is. And refer back to the first point.

    I do think its great he is taking an interest. But I think you can educate and inform without exact detail of your own financial position, and I do not see any benefit of sharing such information.

    I obviously personally would have issue with the idea that he has any kind of entitlement to either the information, or the actual finances. I do however realise that different families operate differently, and maybe you are perfectly fine with that. (I have noticed that smaller families do tend to take different veiws on these issues then larger families). So really you need to figure out what works best for you and your child(ren).
    How do you feel about him wanting that information? How do you feel about the idea of sharing that information?
     
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  18. Scott No Mates

    Scott No Mates Well-Known Member

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    I've been waiting a helluva long time for mine, they won't die so they keep spending it like they're gonna live forever. :oops:
     
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  19. Indifference

    Indifference Well-Known Member

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    We discussed some issues with our son at that age but not specific details ie. Not dollars

    The principles are what matters most & that has been our dialogue over the years. We talked in terms of percentages, rates, ROI etc. as the dollar values are all relative & not really essential to the learnings.
     
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  20. geoffw

    geoffw Moderator Staff Member

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    While our daughters were growing up, we told them in broad terms about what we were doing investment wise.

    But they are very grateful now for working in my fast food business. The youngest was 11 when she started working there, and we had it for 8 years. They were very good workers, and both tell me now how important it was for them to learn a work ethic and to know the value of money.
     
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