Is ignoring the new norm?

Discussion in 'Living Room' started by TMNT, 20th Sep, 2018.

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  1. TMNT

    TMNT Well-Known Member

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    Maybe I'm too old or old school or have misaligned expectations.....
    But is ignoring the new norm for everyone who just doesn't want to reply

    Eg
    Tradie doesn't want to do the job
    Date doesn't want to date you
    Company doesn't want to deal with you
    Company doesn't want to admit liability
    Friends can't be bothered
    Sales rep thinks it's too much work

    I find it all quite rude.

    Is it just me, or is this how the world has moved on
    And would these people be ok. With getting treating the same in reverse?
     
    TMNT, 20th Sep, 2018
    #1
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  2. The Y-man

    The Y-man Moderator Staff Member

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    Ignorance is bliss :p

    The Y-man
     
    The Y-man, 20th Sep, 2018
    #2
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  3. Propertunity

    Propertunity Well-Known Member

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    People now have very short attentions spans. Online they ignore (swipe right or left) and move on.....
     
    Propertunity, 20th Sep, 2018
    #3
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  4. sharon

    sharon Well-Known Member

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    sharon, 20th Sep, 2018
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  5. Simon Hampel

    Simon Hampel Founder Staff Member

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    I think it's almost a requirement when dealing with the information overload we have to manage daily.

    So many things competing for our attention - we really need to tune out everything which is unimportant, which effectively means ignoring them.

    I certainly ignore most of the emails I get sent - because they aren't from people I have an existing business or personal relationship with and they are typically asking for things which do not add value to me or my business.

    On a more personal level with friends/family/clients/etc - I do think it is rude to ignore people ... but also try Googling "why are some people flaky" and read some of the articles to get a better understanding behind the psychology behind why some people are like they are.

    It's far easier to ignore someone than to actually reject them. Many people hate rejection - and they also hate rejecting people - so they'll just ignore the problem as a subtle queue. Sometimes they genuinely are just too busy and over-committed and they aren't intending to be rude - they just don't have the bandwidth to deal with everything.
     
    Simon Hampel, 20th Sep, 2018
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  6. willair

    willair Well-Known Member Premium Member

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    Wait till your over 60,the only thing that's the same is old music..
     
    willair, 20th Sep, 2018
    #6
  7. wylie

    wylie Moderator Staff Member

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    On a slight variation of the topic, is it old fashioned to expect to receive a thank you for a $250 cash wedding gift given to a 26 year old couple (nephew), and $200 cash wedding gift given to a 40 year old couple (not related, friends)?

    I wrote thank you notes for every wedding gift 32 years ago because my mother insisted that was what I should do. I probably would have done it anyway because I was brought up that way.

    Also, in the "old days" if you were invited to a wedding and couldn't attend, it was expected that you would send a gift anyway.

    The nephew (very nice young man, now 31) remarried again recently. We were not in town so couldn't attend. We'd not received a verbal or written thank you for the $250 cash so I didn't bother to send anything for his second wedding.

    Of course, had we attended the wedding, we were asked to give cash again, and (unless his second wife learned some manners) we wouldn't have received a thank you this time.

    Rant over...
     
    wylie, 20th Sep, 2018
    #7
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  8. The Falcon

    The Falcon Well-Known Member

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    No not old fashioned at all. It’s simply good manners to either send a note or call.
     
    The Falcon, 20th Sep, 2018
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  9. skater

    skater Well-Known Member

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    I agree, but all too often, I find the only thankyou's that seem to be sent are a generalised "Thankyou everyone for your gifts" (of similar) post on Facebook.
     
    skater, 20th Sep, 2018
    #9
  10. Scott No Mates

    Scott No Mates Well-Known Member

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    Too true, not every email/voic-email is important, not everything is urgent and not every contact needs to elicit a response.
     
    Scott No Mates, 20th Sep, 2018
    #10
  11. Peter_Tersteeg

    Peter_Tersteeg Mortgage Broker Business Member

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    It's me, not you.
    No, wait a minute. It's you, definitely you.


    I think a lot of our communications have become less personal. I loath text messages and I'm not keen on emails. They're a useful way to give information, but very time consuming for a conversation. People are far more likely to get a better response from me if they pick up the phone and talk to me, than if they text or send a general email.

    I also dislike the idea that people must be available 24/7. Work related things should be reserved for when people are working.
     
    Peter_Tersteeg, 20th Sep, 2018
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  12. D.T.

    D.T. Specialist Property Manager Business Member

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    Different people are different - i much prefer emails as can keep a record of what was said and can also respond either straight away or a couple of hours later depending on whether a response needs to be looked into first.
    Definitely this - everyone should turn their work phones off after hours.
     
    D.T., 20th Sep, 2018
    #12
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  13. Peter_Tersteeg

    Peter_Tersteeg Mortgage Broker Business Member

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    Sorry, let me clarify. Emails are a useful way of asking questions and getting answers, but not for a conversation.

    SMS is too cumbersome for this purpose, better reserved for small bursts of info (like, "Call me back"). Not many people have my mobile number and I don't always carry it anyway.
     
    Peter_Tersteeg, 20th Sep, 2018
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  14. PandS

    PandS Well-Known Member

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    Probably hard for you to turn off work phone as it is expected that you can be contact with the company phone, Best way is not to take it up.

    I don’t have a work phone, offered one but turn it down

    Most people take up the phone thought cos it free everything internet, some like it too as they can pretend they work hard and fire off an email at 10pm or something.

    I prefer my free time when I am away from work and get to do all my hobbies without distractions
     
    PandS, 20th Sep, 2018
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  15. Scott No Mates

    Scott No Mates Well-Known Member

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    Couldn't agree more.
     
    Scott No Mates, 20th Sep, 2018
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  16. The Y-man

    The Y-man Moderator Staff Member

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    Maybe @Peter_Tersteeg has one of those "For quality and training purposes, this conversation will be recorded. Please advise the consultant if you do not want this, and your loan will be rejected". :D

    The Y-man
     
    The Y-man, 20th Sep, 2018
    #16
  17. EN710

    EN710 Well-Known Member

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    This really depends.

    Many people who send requests has some sort of unrealistic expectation that their issue is the one and only important issue on my list. You never know if they are dealing with 50 other things, all asking "please respond to us now!"
    For businesses, I expect a response as I assume they have a level of service if they want to keep clients.
    Your friends? your dates? Not really. They are busy like you do and might miss the 100th items in the message and emails.


    It's a nice thing to do if there are a manageable number of guests (which is possible in Australian wedding). My generation never told to do so - in most wedding I attended to, people can choose not to give. It's nice to get a thank you but it's not an expectation. It's also different culture due to different country. My sister wedding have 1500 guests - good luck on writing hand written thank you notes.
     
    EN710, 20th Sep, 2018
    #17
  18. TMNT

    TMNT Well-Known Member

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    TMNT, 20th Sep, 2018
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  19. TMNT

    TMNT Well-Known Member

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    I remeber years ago i had to ask a friend something very important and i called him and he didn't answer.
    Got a text msg straight away saying what's up

    I got pretty angry and he's like I don't like answering calls.
    Considering I rarely call him and all comm is text or email I got annoyed big time.


    That being said recently, I've started to ignore some phone calls from professional contacts that I know
    And I'll email or call them back later.

    So I'm becoming one of those idiots who I think are rude
     
    TMNT, 20th Sep, 2018
    #19
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  20. Scott No Mates

    Scott No Mates Well-Known Member

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    Is "quality" a defined term? Is it for the quality of the info extracted from the customer that may be used for other purposes?
     
    Scott No Mates, 20th Sep, 2018
    #20
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