Join Australia's most dynamic and respected property investment community

How would your life be different if.........

Discussion in 'Investor Psychology' started by MTR, 1st Jan, 2016.

  1. MTR

    MTR Well-Known Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    19th Jun, 2015
    Posts:
    7,285
    Location:
    Perth, Melbourne, USA
    ......you stopped making negative judgmental assumptions about people you encounter?

    Let today be the day…You look for the good in everyone you meet and respect their journey.


    I love this quote very much, had to post it.

    We are all to quick to judge, we should step back and think about what we say and how it can impact on others, and more importantly what it is doing to YOU.

    As they say in the US.... have a blessed day, hate that, just have a great day

    MTR:)
     
    MRO, Rixter, Xenia and 1 other person like this.
  2. keithj

    keithj Moderator Staff Member

    Joined:
    14th Jun, 2015
    Posts:
    177
    Location:
    Blue Mtns
    Ha... I think the exact opposite. Making instant judgments & assumptions about people is a massive time-saver. I have little time or energy for interacting much about 98% of people I meet. People should have higher standards - the other 2% are worth making an effort for. Of course, there are many false negatives in the 98%, but who cares... the higher hit rate in the 2% makes up for it.

    Nope... life is to short to be nice to ********s.... & a huge proportion of other people ARE ********s... better to just ignore them & concentrate on those more deserving of your attention.

    I disagree again, we have evolved simply because we ARE quick to judge - surely it's a good thing. And I strongly disagree that we should think about what we say.... what we should do instead, is NOT SAY ANYTHING unless we've got something both positive and intelligent to say.

    I somewhat disagree about considering it's impact on others.... it would vary depending on circumstances..... sometimes the 'hard word' needs to be said for both parties benefit.

    I make negative judgments about all sorts of things - those who spew mindless garbage, or those who are unconsciously incompetent or un/knowingly biased, or craft an image that is completely false, or don't understand stats & probabilities, or look at their iphone to frequently and many many other things......

    If you stop making negative judgments then your whole judgment system becomes skewed and you are lying to both yourself & others. My view when you encounter that 98% is just STFU & move on quick.
     
    S.T, dabbler, Bullion Baron and 10 others like this.
  3. Biz

    Biz Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    18th Jun, 2015
    Posts:
    1,471
    Location:
    Sydney
    I'm with Keith. Negative bastards unite!

    There should be a sub forum for all us jaded negative bastards!
     
  4. Leo2413

    Leo2413 Well-Known Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    18th Jun, 2015
    Posts:
    5,713
    Location:
    Sydney
    I have to agree. I've seen too many wishy washy people, too afriad to make a judgement call and love everyone's decisions and actions. They dont get very far on many fronts imo.
     
    Rixter, teg499, MTR and 1 other person like this.
  5. datto

    datto Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    23rd Jun, 2015
    Posts:
    1,391
    Location:
    Mt Druuiitt
    I think things like magazines and other forms of media create this culture where we must judge others....

    "oohh look how much weight they have put on, that dress is a shocker, 2/10 for you and look at that bogan over there"

    These judgements are totally unnecessary, except for the one about the bogan which can make one laugh and writhe almost simultaneously.
     
    Rixter, BigKahuna, MTR and 1 other person like this.
  6. WattleIdo

    WattleIdo renovating Premium Member

    Joined:
    18th Jun, 2015
    Posts:
    1,809
    Location:
    Central West NSW
    If I was ever going to follow anyone, I'd follow you. But then you'd hate that.:confused:
     
    keithj likes this.
  7. WattleIdo

    WattleIdo renovating Premium Member

    Joined:
    18th Jun, 2015
    Posts:
    1,809
    Location:
    Central West NSW
    The difference between judging and (in a healthy way) discriminating/ discerning who is worth hanging around with.
    Edit: discerning is the word I was looking for.
     
    Last edited: 1st Jan, 2016
    BigKahuna and datto like this.
  8. Scott No Mates

    Scott No Mates Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    18th Jun, 2015
    Posts:
    5,536
    Location:
    Sydney or NSW or Australia
    Unless you're observing the Bogan in their natural habitat (not a-la-naturale) at Richmond Marketplace & the odd one out is the non-Bogan.
     
    datto likes this.
  9. freyja

    freyja Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    18th Jun, 2015
    Posts:
    147
    Location:
    Sydney
    I like the sentiment of the quote. I try to be positive but I think it would be hard to completely free yourself from judging - it's somewhat automatic (for me anyway). The important part is to 'respect their journey' - this is the part where you step back and separate yourself from the self-judgement you've made. Years ago I attended a Bruce Sullivan workshop and his message was your good intentions aren't enough of you unintentionally hurt someone or damage a relationship. You have to think beyond what you 'intended' and look at the outcome was - and change things if your intentions do not match the outcome.

    Very important to think about the impact on YOU. If a relationship isn't giving back to you maybe it's time to move on. I'm thinking I may have 'outgrown' one of my friendships and am thinking about quietly bowing out. Who has time to waste? I'd rather invest in more meaningful and fulfilling pursuits.
     
    Rixter, BigKahuna, Leo2413 and 4 others like this.
  10. MTR

    MTR Well-Known Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    19th Jun, 2015
    Posts:
    7,285
    Location:
    Perth, Melbourne, USA
    Your right, That's the point we all judge, I guess perhaps we all need to look in the mirror before we decide to judge

    MTR:)
     
    Last edited: 1st Jan, 2016
    Rixter and Xenia like this.
  11. MTR

    MTR Well-Known Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    19th Jun, 2015
    Posts:
    7,285
    Location:
    Perth, Melbourne, USA
    I think spot on, I would rather make time for the people that matter in my life too

    MTR:)
     
    Last edited: 1st Jan, 2016
    Xenia likes this.
  12. MTR

    MTR Well-Known Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    19th Jun, 2015
    Posts:
    7,285
    Location:
    Perth, Melbourne, USA
    Too funny Biz, start up a thread we can all have some fun:p
     
    Leo2413 likes this.
  13. Player

    Player Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    18th Jun, 2015
    Posts:
    344
    Location:
    Paradiso
    Interesting notion.

    It would be noble to not judge; in particular those who are a little down and out before we've walked in their shoes. I try to follow this (purely based on appearances and stereotype), however for the most part I reckon we all judge others.

    Keith brings up a valid point that it saves time and I agree especially if in the context of a large group or meeting. Maybe rather than use the word judge, perhaps evaluate is a more apt term. It is important to filter out those time wasters and psychic vampires. Not so sure about the 98 % and 2 % splits but I totally understand the gist of where Keith is coming from. Anecdotally to me it probably is closer to 90 % and 10 %. I am a fairly tolerant person however I can't stand ineptness beyond three chances and I don't suffer fools.

    So whilst we may judge (or evaluate/assess), it probably is better to do this with the perspective of not being a hater and trying to analyse or dissect other's mediocrity (or even success in some cases). Maybe being a little more tolerant is a good thing. This doesn't imply bending over backwards to those who do not resonate with you or are likely to try and drag you down, however more to simply ignore their traits that are opposed to ours and move on to those who are aligned with us and our characteristics and ambitions.

    Family are another matter............love your family (in doses) and choose your peers :D

    Happy New Year everyone :)
     
    Handyandy, Rixter, York and 3 others like this.
  14. MTR

    MTR Well-Known Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    19th Jun, 2015
    Posts:
    7,285
    Location:
    Perth, Melbourne, USA


    Player, always have a way with words, a nice balance, I get this, we can learn a lot from your comments


    MTR:)
     
  15. Gockie

    Gockie I'm an ISTP-A female, so I might be a bit quirky! Premium Member

    Joined:
    18th Jun, 2015
    Posts:
    4,882
    Location:
    Sydney
    This thread would have turned out completely differently if Keith did not post his post. There is a tendency to be swayed by what we see to a greater or lessor degree.
     
    Last edited: 1st Jan, 2016
    MTR likes this.
  16. MTR

    MTR Well-Known Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    19th Jun, 2015
    Posts:
    7,285
    Location:
    Perth, Melbourne, USA
    How so, just curious?

    How we decide to live our life is our own choice we don't have to agree.



    MTR
     
    Last edited: 1st Jan, 2016
  17. Gockie

    Gockie I'm an ISTP-A female, so I might be a bit quirky! Premium Member

    Joined:
    18th Jun, 2015
    Posts:
    4,882
    Location:
    Sydney
    The thread would have turned out differently I reckon. Interesting. Great to see a diversity of opinion, its good to take a step back, process what is written and think about other viewpoints.

    I reckon we should give everybody a chance, but sometimes you can just tell (tattoos etc).
    I also reckon people often assume a guy can do something, but a female can't or they assume won't be as skilled in it. I don't want an arguement on gender but it happens.

    Its a bad assumption. Same as some ethnic groups can do something better or worse than others. Gotta look at the individual rather than a stereotype.
     
  18. Leo2413

    Leo2413 Well-Known Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    18th Jun, 2015
    Posts:
    5,713
    Location:
    Sydney
    @Gockie lol love your tattoo comment! :p
     
    Rixter, RetireRich101 and MTR like this.
  19. Gockie

    Gockie I'm an ISTP-A female, so I might be a bit quirky! Premium Member

    Joined:
    18th Jun, 2015
    Posts:
    4,882
    Location:
    Sydney
    That's a life choice marker.... :)
     
  20. MTR

    MTR Well-Known Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    19th Jun, 2015
    Posts:
    7,285
    Location:
    Perth, Melbourne, USA
    Agree with this.

    Just about everyone has Tatts these days, it's a fashion statement right? I don't have Tatts:p

    I promise I won't judge if anyone has Tatts:)
     
    Iamnumber5 and Xenia like this.