Holding on to Wealth

You too

 

I can't think of anything more despicable than trying to control your kids when you're dead. My family isn't like that and I wouldn't know anyone that would do it either.

 

I don't have a problem with it, hence my idea to do it. Whilst the kids are little they need to be protected in case we die. If we live to a ripe old age and we can see that the kids are aok and don't need a nanny state will then we will probably change it.
I only have to look at young sports people etc who come into money at an early age and don't have the wherewithall to know how to handle it, it can destroy them. I'm not keen for that for my kids so I'll tiger mum from the grave.

 

My comments is in reference to controlling your kids for as long as possible, even when they are adults.

 

Cool. I'm not Gina Reinhart.
Once the kids are old enough then can take over.

 

It's a tough one, I can certainly see why having strict provisions in place might be tempting but also don't like the idea of controlling from the grave, especially if they're of a decent age.

Besides, if every child of mine is so terrible financially they need strict provisions as adults to control their cash then I wouldve failed miserably as a parent, in this sector at least. In that case who would I be to judge them for their in abilities? If 1 kid struggles with something it could just be that kid. If all the kids in a family do there's surely a more than decent chance it's the parents fault.

 

Inherited wealth is just another opportunity in life that can be either squandered or capitalised upon. Either way, it can teach a lesson.

 

I know in my family we have those that are brilliant with money and those that have no clue, no guarantees even though we had the same parents. Its very weird how these things work.

 

Set ours up a few years ago now, so all done..via 3rd Generation, Bloodline Trusts including age clauses.

 

When I leave this world, most of what I pass on will not be of my making--it will be that of my parents' blood, sweat and tears. I have already told my children that it is not to be squandered; that it was not made easily; that it is for posterity. I will do my best to ensure that the assets are not squandered, either by money-grubbers, poor decisions or immaturity. Then whatever happens happens. I adore my children and am grateful that they are mature, responsible and decent. It's also designed to protect them.

LOL @ 'despicable' by protecting your kids legally, safeguarding their best interests, minimising the potential for squabbles between siblings/relatives, ensuring that fly-bys don't make a grab for the cash and then run, and easing the burden on everyone when you go. I see a lot of legal stoushes, consternation and jaw gnashing when parents DON'T spell out clearly their wishes in their wills. To do otherwise would be foolhardy and imbecilic.

 

Very wise.

 

That's what I tell my parents to do. I consider it their money, not mine. They earned it, they should spend it. All our lives they have raised us to be self sufficient. Why stop now?

 

I wanted the kids to inherit only once they had amassed a proportion of the inheritance, maybe 50% or 10% or whatever, or even only once they had saved, or invested their first $100,000 or something.

My wife said I was a douche and to just let it go, so I did. When we die, each of them gets a third.

 

I like this.

My kids will have full control long before I'm gone. I was very involved in my family's assets along with my parents when I was just a teen and helped to make decisions on purchases and driving businesses. My kids will be involved in the same way so it will be a natural progression for them and not an estate to be divided.

Most people who own businesses come to the realisation that the business is bigger than you and can stand alone as an entity whether you are there or not. Businesses and estates can continue for generations - I am grooming my kids to keep things going just like my dad worked on providing me with a mindset for growth right from a young age - and is still one of my best advisors even now.

 

I was not involved in making money decisions, but I was always involved in the day-to-day affairs of my parents, simply because they couldn't speak English well. I was their translator. I read contracts, filled out building contracts, sat in on meetings. That's why I think it's important to talk to your children about money from the beginning. It stands them in good stead. Xenia, sounds like the same happened in your family.

 

I think it's a European thing BK, very close families. I am still very involved with my parents and brother and now in laws too.

However making decisions, I remember my dad had a meeting once with a commercial agent about purchasing a new business - a cafe in Glenelg. I was 15 at that time and he took me there to check it out, my 15 year old brain was checking out the guys who worked there and there was one very good looking one. My dad asked me if I thought he should buy it, I said yes dad it has a lot of potential, he asked me why and I was looking around to find something to say. I then saw the chocolate cake in the window display and said - that cake will bring in a lot of customers. He ordered the cake and the cute guy bought it over.

He then bought the cafe - it was a real winner, great money maker but my initial advice was based on how good looking the male staff were LOL.

Years later, my dad told me that he knew that, he knew I was 15 and where I was at but wanted to involve me for a later experience.

 

I love that your dad asked for your opinion and advice Xenia and then ostensibly took it, all the while knowing your real reason for giving it. I believe that we empower our children to learn, grow and become confident with money by involving them and allowing them to be part of the discussion around money. They learn by osmosis.

 

So true. Children will never do what you tell them, they become who you are. They download your most deepest subconscious programs, dramatise them and use them to challenge you to the max.
My kids know every hot button I have and they take pleasure in showing me my own limitations.
I would not ever have it any other way though, it's what I created in life.

 

Anyone attempting to be both prudent (and nice) to their offspring could do worse than pass on some Berkshire Hathaway shares that are unsaleable for, say, 10 years.

Surely those two old blokes (and I'm not talking about Statler and Waldorf..) running the show had a bit of a handle on how to manage their shareholders money...

 

Putting kids through school is enough and giving them the ability to earn, and letting them have the challenge , satisfaction, self worth, self respect, and sense of achievement of earning their own assets, is the best gift you can give them. Allowing them to appreciate what they have. I have meet rich kids who have no ambition, no aims, no sense of purpose, they are just miserable **** pots and idiots I will do them a favour and spend my money. Doing otherwise will be depriving them, especially in this country of great opportunity.