Happy International Men's Day!

Discussion in 'Living Room' started by Mombius Hibachi, 19th Nov, 2015.

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  1. Esel

    Esel Well-Known Member

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    Shame you had to have a dig at 'feminists' while highlighting an important issue.

    Do you really believe 200 people speak for all feminists? From what ive read, there was a dispute about how equality is best achieved and the agenda of one of the accademics connected with the day. Another 1000 people, including many who identify as feminists, called for the IMD event to be reinstated.

    I think the irony that might be lost on you, is that a society with more equality and less ridged gender roles would actually improved men's quality of life too.

    Like many feminists, im married to a man and i have a son and a brother etc.. I dont see why being a feminist would preclude me from caring deeply about their safety, health and opportunities.
     
  2. Xenia

    Xenia Well-Known Member

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    We still love them
     
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  3. Xenia

    Xenia Well-Known Member

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    Because labelling a group of people as having the power to stop anyone from being happy is a great excuse to stay depressed and unempowered.
     
  4. Xenia

    Xenia Well-Known Member

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    I like this
    Don't carry things around, they are too heavy and will bring you down.

    Individuals should always have access to traditional methods like the medical profession and psychology if they feel that that's what they need but don't ever underestimate the power of the human mind.

    I would not turn to psychologists personally they are people who are trying to find the light by studying the dark - they don't have the answers.

    An individual can seek help in any form but the answer always lies in switching on the light from within.
     
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  5. MTR

    MTR Well-Known Member

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    Great post
    Have a friend who is a psychiatrist told me he would be out of business if half his clients had real friends that would listen, in the main that is all they need.
     
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  6. Peter_Tersteeg

    Peter_Tersteeg Mortgage Broker Business Member

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    Ha! My wife told me a few days ago that she's glad I don't have a 6 pack. She she's happy I don't look like I did in my 20s because then she'd feel pressure to look like she did in her 20s...

    Thank god our relationship isn't based on looks, middle age sucks but getting there together makes for a good 'boobie prize'. :)
     
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  7. Kesse

    Kesse Well-Known Member

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    And if the depression (or mental illness of any form) is caused by a chemical imbalance?

    I do believe that a lot of things can be sorted by searching within but sometimes it's outside of the person's control. They just can't say "hey hypothalamus, pick up your game" or "geez, thyroid gland, you're letting the team down". Sometimes that imbalance needs outside help.
     
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  8. geoffw

    geoffw Moderator Staff Member

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    She bought her own strongly cash flow positive property using her own savings at one day old .
     
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  9. turk

    turk Well-Known Member

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    Which was the whole point of the University of York having an International Mans Day, sadly and unfortunately it was blocked by a group of feminists.
     
  10. Xenia

    Xenia Well-Known Member

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    It was all created in a past life experience Geoff ;)
     
  11. turk

    turk Well-Known Member

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    Wow Xenia, Bearing in mind that you were a scientist how did you reach this conclusion?
     
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  12. Xenia

    Xenia Well-Known Member

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    its not a conclusion, it's a view point that works for me right now and you are welcome to have a different one.
     
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  13. Xenia

    Xenia Well-Known Member

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    You are still good looking Peter.
     
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  14. Perthguy

    Perthguy Well-Known Member

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    I don't agree with this at all. I think it is very difficult for some people, particularly men, to admit they need professional help. But at times they do. I am a very independent thinking person and I am fiercely self sufficient. I don't let things bother me and I do have a close circle of friends who I can talk to a rely on. However, in the past I did need to seek professional help while I was at uni. That was a big deal for me. Of course I found a very, very good psychologist and seeing him helped a lot. This was not an issue where "switching on the light from within" did anything for me. I'm already "switched on" and self aware. I always have been. This was something I needed professional help to understand. I wouldn't discourage people from seeking professional help. It's good and sometimes necessary. Just find a good professional.

    Thanks to @Mombius Hibachi for starting the thread. There are a lot of men with mental health issues who won't seek help because of a lot of reasons. It is good to let them know it is good for them to admit they have a problem and either talk about it or seek help if needed.
     
  15. wylie

    wylie Moderator Staff Member

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    I believe anything that helps those with depression is great, men, women or children. It is just such a shame the particular (and well worn) vibe of the initial post has a women hating slant.

    I'm quite sure there are hundreds of helpful sites and stories to help and support men that could just as easily been linked to other than one that bashes women (again).

    Sometimes the message is lost when the delivery method is poorly chosen.
     
  16. Xenia

    Xenia Well-Known Member

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    I agree Wylie - you cannot hate and be happy at the same time. Hating people is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. They won't, you will.
     
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  17. Peter_Tersteeg

    Peter_Tersteeg Mortgage Broker Business Member

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    All fair points I think. Depression is an illness and there are treatments available. It's a really awful illness however which is hard to appreciate unless you've been exposed to it. A lot of people say, "Just get over it", it's not that simple, it's not something people can get over by simply wanting too.

    A family member has been undergoing treatment for depression for almost 2 years now, I support that person every day. Even so, I often find myself thinking they just need to smile a bit more, try to take a more positive approach. An injury, a cold, a disability is easy to see, understand and thus treat. A mental disorder is very insidious, difficult to recognise and treatment is a slow and often trial and error process.

    Looking within is also a good point. It's very difficult for others to help if you don't want that help then. Without wanting to make thing better it's difficult for external assistance to be of much use. Any medical professional will tell you that a positive approach can make a massive difference in recovery.

    In the context of Mens day, it's probably fair to say that for the most part women tend to share their feelings more openly than men. Men are often expected to be stoic, to 'just get on with it'. Often this attitude is self inflicted. In this environment it becomes easier to recognise and treat. Isolation is a an easy way for depression to avoid recognition.

    Mens day doesn't need to be about the sexes. It's recognition that depression does affect men and women, but perhaps men require different strategies to diagnose and treat it. If some guy sees the headline, "International Men's Day", thinks that they might be suffering from depression and seek help, then it's been of use. Realistically if you labelled it "International Depression Day", it's probably not going to get a second glance by a lot of men.
     
    Last edited: 19th Nov, 2015
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  18. MTR

    MTR Well-Known Member

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    Agree, and its not exclusive to men.

    Lets blame my cat, lets blame my dog, lets live in the past that will help depression...not

    Don't get caught up with the noise and negativity, otherwise you help no one, and please can we have some adult conversation where its not about men vs women, surprise surprise, who started this thread?

    If the person who started the thread was really concerned about this issue then he needs to stick to the topic, otherwise its pretty sick, as the intension is to always play man vs women....... yawn....shame on you.... think that has been done to death.
     
    Last edited: 19th Nov, 2015
  19. Mombius Hibachi

    Mombius Hibachi Well-Known Member

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    I find it absolutely shameful that people are hijacking a thread dedicated to raising awareness of mental health issues for men and making it about themselves.

    Mental illness is something that I have lived with for most of my life. It's hard enough - as a male - to deal with, let alone having society as a whole expect to me 'to suck it up' and 'take it like a man'.

    Why do you think that in Australia 5 out of every 7 suicides are men? (Man Stats)

    Personally I find it absolutely disgusting that a small group of people on here find it acceptable to turn a post that merely showed how men's mental health issues are treated as being worthless is turned into me being a woman hating misogynist.

    Quite frankly all of you who attacked me on the issue and those of you who 'liked' the subsequent posts should be ashamed of yourselves. Politicising male mental health issues? That is the lowest of the low.

    To put it another way. Let's reverse the genders. If this was about International Women's Day (which I wholeheartedly support), and these posts had been about women, this thread would have been inundated with reports and almost certainly deleted. The accusations of 'bullying' would have been a mile long. I want to make it perfectly clear that I have not reported any posts and/or forum members and do not want any posts in this thread to be deleted - everyone has the right to express their opinion, no matter how distasteful I consider them to be. As an adult with a spine, I can defend my views without having to hide behind the moderators.

    Having said that, I truly believe there are a number of people in this thread who have either posted their opinions or liked certain posts who seriously need to take a look in the mirror and ask themselves what kind of person they really are.
     
    Last edited: 20th Nov, 2015
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  20. Bayview

    Bayview Well-Known Member

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    What a shame this thread is now a post-bomb explosion site.
     
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