Technology & Social Media Do you use your real name on facebook?

Discussion in 'Living Room' started by wylie, 13th Nov, 2017.

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  1. Kesse

    Kesse Well-Known Member

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    I have my privacy settings fairly strict (and also strict about who I accept as a friend) but even still, I don't put anything on there I wouldn't care if the whole world saw it including people I deal with in either my private or business lives.
     
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  2. wylie

    wylie Moderator Staff Member

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    I agree. Times were much simpler when there was no other option. But things change when you have children, even grown children. Our adult son nearly died two years ago and one year after that horrible time, we left Australia for two months of travel knowing he was well.

    I didn't bother with emails but wanted to know that if something happened to anyone in the family, especially our kids, we could be reached. So each night, and often if we were on a train with wifi through the day, I'd log in to check if there was any message.

    Imagine sitting on a train in Europe, log into wifi and get a call from my son saying he was going in for surgery after a flare up of his condition. We could do nothing, but knowing he was in good hands, and the prognosis for this surgery was positive, I was able to relax.

    When this same son went overseas aged 21, I chose not to contact him with the news his beloved grandmother was dying. I chose not to spoil his trip with news he could do nothing about. But at least had my mother passed away while he was away, or if she deteriorated so much that he would never see her again, I could have given him the news and the option of rushing home.

    So it is all well and good to say "relax, enjoy and don't think about anything back home" but that doesn't always work. ;)
     
  3. geoffw

    geoffw Moderator Staff Member

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    When our kids would send us a FB message, they wouldn't care what time it was in Australia. I loved hearing from them, but the phone would beep at some ungodly hours. I wouldn't turn off the alarm, because there was a chance it was a genuine emergency, but it never was.

    I'm going to get my revenge. Now I don't even need to touch their phones. I'll just say "Ok Google, wake me up at 3AM" near their phones.
     
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  4. Lil Skater

    Lil Skater Well-Known Member

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    I've got my real name on there and I'm very easy to find because of it. I have my public profile very well knuckled down though, all you can see is my profile picture and cover photo. I also have it so only my friends can see the comments on my profile picture, but not sure how to do this on the cover photo (anyone know?).

    I have that everyone can add me, but I am selective with who I accept.
     
  5. hash_investor

    hash_investor Well-Known Member

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    I don't see any harm in using my real name on fb. But then I do know how to control my posts and what to post up there. I am in the IT and know very well where to look for the solution of privacy problems. If a stranger look at my profile they won't be able to see anything meaningful.
     
  6. Tony3008

    Tony3008 Well-Known Member

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    I'm on with my real name but have settings set to only friends can view my posts. A couple of my FB friends, one a teacher, one a midwife, are on FB under contrived names so as not to be readily discoverable by their clients which is quite understandable.
     
  7. Gockie

    Gockie Life is good ☺️ Premium Member

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    I think though, even if you don't accept everybody, sometimes they can still see your posts? Unless it's a setting. I have lots of random people asking for friend requests and I have no idea who they are.

    Personally, a little while back I wanted to put down a temporary name change and then facebook blocked the change, coming back with a message saying it had to be your real name...
     
  8. Marg4000

    Marg4000 Well-Known Member

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    Adjust your settings.

    I can only receive friend requests from friends of friends. And even then I only accept relatively few.
    Marg
     
  9. Lizzie

    Lizzie Well-Known Member

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    I have a policy that if I bumped into "that" person on the street then we would immediately go for a cuppa and catchup ... that is my criteria for a FB friend ... had a massive cull a few years back and it was so rewarding.

    I do use my real name, but knowing my mum is a FB friend does tend to stifle any need to post something controversial. I do love FB for chatting to overseas family and for passing messages with local friends.

    I do make a point of never indicating I'm not home, until I get back from my holiday - and my business page is vital for me at this stage
     
  10. wylie

    wylie Moderator Staff Member

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    Thanks Lizzie. I don't have many FB friends as I've always been picky about who I add, but I have some early additions when I was starting out that I just don't see these days.

    I sat with my son's partner tonight to work out how to restrict things even more, and make it that nobody can see anything on my timeline (except my profile picture) if I don't know them.

    Can I ask how you did your massive cull? I have a couple of people that I don't even recall accepting, and a few who I just wouldn't call or meet for that "cuppa test".

    But my son says "unfriending" is just not something I should do.

    We put my real name back, and there is nothing personal, embarrassing or controversial that I post. Mostly I "like" or "share" things about old houses or "that politician who cannot be named" (you know the one). ;)

    I plan on making a new group consisting of family and a few friends who I am happy to share with. I just don't like the idea of those "not really friends" sitting there and want to delete them, but apparently that isn't done. :confused:
     
  11. Joynz

    Joynz Well-Known Member

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    You can unfollow friends so you no longer see their posts - but you still remain friends technically.

    However if you really don’t want to be friends, then just unfriend people. However, they may feel a bit hurt if they find out.

    Facebook says that people you unfriend don't get notified though.

    Unfriending or Blocking Someone | Facebook Help Center | Facebook
     
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  12. Lizzie

    Lizzie Well-Known Member

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    I just unfriended - honestly, they were people that I really couldn't care less if they took offence or not ... you can simply block them if you're worried about hurting feelings.

    One joy of getting older - I'm past worrying about hurting the feelings of people I don't care about
     
  13. Blacky

    Blacky Well-Known Member

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    I actively try to avoid being ‘findable’.
    I have deleted my FB, pintrist and other media accounts. The only exception is an (incomplete) LinkedIn acct.

    Even so I can still find myself - which is somewhat scary.

    I’m always stunned at what people are willing to share online.
    I’ve knocked back numerous job applicants due to their ‘public profiles’

    Blacky
     
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  14. Lil Skater

    Lil Skater Well-Known Member

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    I love Facebook stalking people when they apply for photos, it’s interesting what some people will put up publicly.
     
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  15. Marg4000

    Marg4000 Well-Known Member

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    I went to unfriend someone I no longer saw and rarely heard from.
    She had got in first and unfriended me!!!
    Marg
     
  16. wylie

    wylie Moderator Staff Member

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    So you weren't notified that you'd been unfriended? I would hate to hurt someone's feelings, but they probably aren't any more interested in me than I am in them. I do know when I first signed up, my son added a few people to show me how to do it. With hindsight that wasn't clever.
     
  17. geoffw

    geoffw Moderator Staff Member

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    I don't see people unfriending.

    A person I knew - not well - was waiting anxiously for the SSM vote as her partner had terminal cancer, and wanted to get married while they still had time. I can't tell what has happened to them.
     
  18. LifesGood

    LifesGood Well-Known Member

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    CD1EB21A-EDC2-47E1-A34B-87962196BB66.jpeg
     
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  19. Marg4000

    Marg4000 Well-Known Member

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    No, that's the beauty of it. They won't know unless they go looking.

    I only found out that I had been unfriended (ouch!) when I scrolled through my list of friends looking for her name so I could unfriend her!

    Or you can unfollow someone. They will still see your posts but you won't see theirs.
    Marg
     
  20. Ted Varrick

    Ted Varrick Well-Known Member

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    Thanks, @datto , for enlightening us all about how the Postcard Bandit got nabbed.
     
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