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Conscious Parenting - why kids SHOULD talk back to their parents.

Discussion in 'Living Room' started by Xenia, 24th Jan, 2016.

  1. Xenia

    Xenia Adelaide Property Manager Business Member

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  2. EN710

    EN710 Well-Known Member

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    I'd think 'no' and 'why' is a natural state for kids :D

    I prefer kids to understand something about taking responsibility of their own actions. At a certain point in someone's life, there will be time that they can no longer use bad parenting as an excuse of their own behavior, that's what I think anyway :oops:
     
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  3. Xenia

    Xenia Adelaide Property Manager Business Member

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    That's true but good parenting makes it easier for the child later on.
     
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  4. inertia

    inertia Well-Known Member

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    I read something once (can't remember where) along the lines of: the qualities we want to encourage in a 25yo, we try to discourage in a toddler...
    I want my kids to question authority, think strategically, change the status quo, and part of that includes them questioning me on the way I do things, and calling me out if they think I'm doing something wrong.
    The challenge is getting them to understand that being part of a community (family and broader) means that sometimes you have to do things you may not want to do, that compromises have to be made, and that there are consequences to actions...

    Cheers,
    Inertia
     
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  5. Brian84

    Brian84 Well-Known Member

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    No and why is all I have been hearing lately from my 3 yo son
     
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  6. Xenia

    Xenia Adelaide Property Manager Business Member

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    So he is perfectly normal.
     
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  7. JessicaP

    JessicaP Well-Known Member

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    Parenting for a Peaceful World by Robin Grille is an awesome read if you are into this stuff.

    Finding a balance between permissive and authoritarian parenting is important and where I'm seeing people fall down a bit (permissive parenting can be just as damaging as authoritarian). Robin calls the balance "authoritative" parenting.

    I like to treat my kids like I would treat any human - I don't hit them (I wouldn't even contemplate hitting another adult, why is it acceptable to hit a defenseless child), I get angry with them when they are a*holes, I explain and try to show appropriate behaviour in each situation and try (try!!) to be patient while they learn. It's called respect ;)
     
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  8. Brian84

    Brian84 Well-Known Member

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    Yep just a normal 3yo. I like him asking me why about things. Means he is learning.
     
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  9. wylie

    wylie Moderator Staff Member

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    Tell that to my 57 year old brother - everything is someone else's fault. :rolleyes:
     
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  10. Redwing

    Redwing Well-Known Member

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    Define good parenting :D

    It's a mythical beast with many faces
     
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  11. Xenia

    Xenia Adelaide Property Manager Business Member

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    Isn't it?
     
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  12. JessicaP

    JessicaP Well-Known Member

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    Good parenting is theoretical. I think at the end of the day if you are genuinely trying that's what matters. I also think that parenting has gotten.....more complex.....in recent times (since easy access to info on the net. Analysis paralysis can happen when raising a child too ;)
     
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  13. Xenia

    Xenia Adelaide Property Manager Business Member

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    I'm sure there are perfect parents out there, I'm not one of them.

    The article was more about being conscious not to suppress children and allow them to develop into who they are meant to be.
    So many adults still exhibiting behaviours that appease their parents expectations of them instead of being themselves. That's what happens when children are invalidated and moulded into something a parent wants.

    This is not about not setting boundaries, good parents know the difference between correcting a bad behaviour and putting down the child for producing it.